First lady

It takes some courage to charge into a battlefield that took away a loved one. Yet, eight months after the death of her husband, Major Sukhwinder Jeet Randhawa, and with a one-year-old daughter in her lap, Ravinder Jeet Randhawa joined the Indian Army. Now a lieutenant colonel, Ravinder Jeet, 51, was the first Veer Nari, or martyr’s widow, to join the force.

It was on June 17, 1997, while she was watching the serial Shanti on Doordarshan, that the call came. The mortal remains came two days later, by road.

Sukhwinder’s 2 Rashtriya Rifles battalion was deployed in Jammu and Kashmir. On June 17, based on intelligence inputs, Sukhwinder reached Kashipora village in Anantnag district. The terrorists fired on the troops and Sukhwinder was hit, but he soldiered on and shot a terrorist dead. He then killed another one who had been launching grenades. Seeing Sukhwinder bleeding heavily, one of his men tried to move him to a safer location. “Tu meri fikar chhod, uss terrorist ko maar (Don’t worry about me, go get that terrorist),” he said. While his bravery spurred the others to fight back, Sukhwinder soon succumbed to his injuries.

For his courage, fighting spirit, camaraderie and supreme sacrifice, the government honoured him with the Kirti Chakra, the nation’s second-highest peacetime gallantry award.

Ravinder accepted the medal on her husband’s behalf in April 1998, about a year later, in her Officers Training Academy (OTA) uniform. She had wanted to continue his legacy, and had taken the torch from him.

It was not easy, though. There were very few female officers at the time and she was already 28 when her Sukhwinder died; the cut-off age to join the Army was 25. But she was determined. Her husband had told her that he wanted to raise their child in an Army background as it was “a beautiful organisation”.

After talking to her father-in-law, who was a former Army man, Ravinder reached out to Ranjana Malik, wife of then Army chief General Ved Prakash Malik. Seeing her determination, Ranjana took up her case with the defence ministry and a special waiver was arranged.

In December 1997, Ravinder cleared the Service Selection Board exam and joined the OTA in Chennai in March 1998. After graduation, she joined the Ordnance Corps.

As she belonged to a family of athletes, Ravinder kept pace with younger cadets. She would later become a scuba diver and participate in multiple marathons, including one in the icy heights of Ladakh. “Though she was never weak, her military training made her stronger,” said one of her relatives. They said that, despite being a single mother, she never asked for any relaxation in her duties.

When her husband was posted in Kashmir, Ravinder used to live with her sister in Jalandhar. And that is where she left her daughter, Simran, when she joined the OTA. After she joined the Army, Simran has gone with her on every posting. From the Line of Control to the Line of Actual Control, Ravinder has had a long and proud journey in the Army. “It’s not an easy one, and the Army helped us a lot. The day I wore the uniform, I thought I was fulfilling my husband’s dream,” she had told her family.

When she got married at 25, her life was “blank”, she says. She knew little about Army life. Born in Chautala village in Tarn Taran district of Punjab, Ravinder was the youngest of three siblings. Her father worked in the state tourism department. She had found Sukhwinder through a matrimonial ad in the newspaper. The couple moved to the Faridkot military station. A graduate, she started teaching in a nearby school. A year later, Simran was born.

Simran has now returned from Canada after graduation. She vaguely remembers her Papa—he was posted in Kashmir when she was one—but she has been told that he was a man full of love and affection.

“When I was born, one of Papa’s greatest wishes came true; he had always wanted a daughter,” Simran told THE WEEK. “He would care for me like no other. Even if it meant waking up in the middle of the night to feed me or wash my dirty cloth diapers. He did it all and cherished every moment of it. He used to come back from the office and cook for us. He would strap me to his chest and take me to the office. He was always there for us. Somehow, I was always aware that no matter what life has to offer, what hardships we must face, Papa would be there for us, holding our hand, keeping us safe; and, in his way, he did.”

As for her mother, Simran has always seen her as a pillar of strength. “She has not once let me feel that I was missing out,” she said. “She has been my mother, father, best friend, all rolled into one. She is a superhero. That is not to say that any of this has been easy. She went from being a blissful wife and mother to warrior, a soldier. She struggled a lot and yet shielded me from it.

“She would spend all day in the office and then come home and take me to tuition or skating or dance classes or anywhere I would want to go. She never let her stress or exhaustion affect me. If I am half as strong as her, I would consider myself the luckiest person in the world. She is my hero.”

The article is based on conversation with the officer's family and friends.